54

You have made black a great colour
when mixed with a tiny stain of white on the chest
Your brown eyes that light ours
when you come and go in a play of fetch.

Your two cute little ears that I touch and grab like ponytails
that used to really annoy you before, now you let it be
I don't know if it's because it's alright now
Or you think it's better to ignore it and get it over with.

You lay in the most strange positions
and you must know that it makes us laugh a lot
the fact that you don't even seem to care
or mind how ridiculous you look.

You have brought us joy back
when we needed to feel a little better again
thank you for accepting us
with everything to offer and litte to gain.

53

Sometimes I am too cold and I regret it.
In your eyes I see that it hurts you.
And I want to undo things and erase me.

Other times I want more and I don't say it
Afraid you'll think I'm being a fool.
So I keep it closed inside me.

At times I am sure you must hate me
for behaving in such childish ways
And I hate you for affecting me.

Most times things are really good
and I wish I told you more often
how thankful you make me feel.

52

I want to tell so you many things
and because I am an idiot
I keep them all inside me
waiting for you to understand them.

I want to be brave enough
to allow myself to be vulnerable
but I have build strong forts
I don't know how to tear apart.

I want to be more honest with you
and confess you make me happy
with the things that you do
or by just being with me.

I want to confess my secrets
and repent of my sins
let you wipe away my tears
and simply let you in.

I want to love you fully
like I wish I could do now
and embrace you openly
without fear or doubt.

51

It slips away, furtive
and the blank page stares
at the eyes that look
at your fingers tapping the keys.

And what do you write?
What is there to tell
that no one has told before
better than you?

Trying is always good
but what's it worth
when no one will read this
and hear my voice.

Whas is this, really?
my own futile attemp
at going back in time
and learn myself again.